Into The Abyss

“You took the time to lock your car?” If I didn’t know better, I would have said that Samantha seemed a little miffed.

“In my defense,” Ah there they were. Those little key bastards had managed to slide their way around to the top front of my pocket where they had stuck themselves into a tight corner. “You didn’t actually need rescuing when I got here. I heard you in the backyard and saw the thing jump into you from Baby just as I was walking up to the gate.”

She nodded thoughtfully while I unlocked the car, manually because that’s how old it was. Then I got in and reached across the seat to unlock the passenger door for Sam. Which was silly since she could have just walked right through…

With sudden realization, I looked up and watched through the window as Sam’s hand passed through the door handle. She giggled at herself nervously and slapped a hand to her forehead for forgetting that she could pass through solid objects. But I knew she hadn’t realized the worst of it yet.

Still giggling, Sam stepped into the car and stood in the passenger seat. I sat up as she moved into place, giving her room so that I wouldn’t pass through her as Baby had. Then she tried to sit down. And she went right to the ground. The top of her head was only just visible over the seat.

“We seem to have a problem.” Her voice was muffled as it was coming through the foam and stuffing of the car seat.

“Yeah!” I agreed wholeheartedly. “This is a big fucking problem.” For a few stunned seconds, I just stared at the ghostly crown of Samantha’s head thinking about how many times I’d dreamt about her head at right about that level in my car doing something completely different. And yeah, I’m not gonna lie. I had a first-rate, selfish mini pity party in my head about the fact that I would never get to feel her touchi-

“Feeling!” The word stumbled blindly out of my mouth, squinting dazedly at the brilliance of my unusual moment of inspiration.

“Huh?” The island head in my passenger seat rose and exposed a face that had been, if not crying, then on the verge of tears.

“You said you could feel Baby’s drool when she went through you, right?” The idea was half-cocked and cockamamie but if it worked…

“Well, yeah.” Sam moved higher up. She must have been kneeling. “It was kind of gross.” Good, good. Maybe we could work with this.

“Did you feel anything else? Holding my breath I hoped against hope that there was something we could use.

“I could kind of feel her…” She cocked her head to one side the way she did when she was thinking “…her dogginess. I guess.”

“Yesss!” In a rare moment of intellectual triumph, I indulged in a fist pump. “I think that means you can possess me.”

“What?” A choking cough met my idea. But my theory hadn’t been proven wrong yet so… “You want me to possess you?”

“Yep. I don’t see any other way to get you to grandma’s house before the big bad demon.” She shrugged her slim shoulders fatalistically.

“Fuckit! Let’s do this shit.” As Sam stood, her head went out the top of the car and I couldn’t see it anymore. Her slim legs and hips sidled closer to me than they’d probably ever been and I was so sad that the extent of my game was ghost ass in my face as I was about to be possessed. Really plump, bootylicious, badonkadonk ghost ass, but incorporeal and therefore while thrilling, was not quite as thrilling as it might have been.

As her soul settled into my body, I felt a chill run through me, followed by a tingling warmth. I shuddered. Then my hand moved. But I wasn’t moving it.

“Sweet!” My mouth exclaimed, yet I wasn’t the one talking. I really wasn’t expecting that to work.”

‘Holy shit!’ I tried to talk to Sam, but I couldn’t move any part of my body. ‘Crap. How was I supposed to talk to Sam?’

“I can hear you.” My voice assured me with a laugh that was not nearly as gruff as I usually sounded.

“Perhaps we should continue the ‘Quest for Caleb’?” There was a lyrical lilt of amusement that just sounded wrong coming out of my lips.

‘Yeah. Sure. That sounds great!’ My thoughts were a little distracted because I didn’t remember ever telling Samantha the ‘Quest for Caleb’ thing I’d thought up not more than a few minutes ago.

“You didn’t tell me.” Sam paused for effect, giving me time to realize that she was implying that.. “I…uh…noticed that you like your jeans a little bit on the tighter side. Is that for showing off your assets or for hiding the effects that badonkadonks have on them?”

‘God damnit! You can read my mind? That’s not fucking fair!’